PTS Awareness – Day 1 – I RELAPSED


By trying to get as “HIGH” as possible … up Cloud 9, on Whistler Blackcomb ,with our tractor tire to raise awareness to Post Traumatic Stress, Mental Health, Addiction and Recovery.

Day 1 – Flipped 1.7 kms – 728 Vertical meters

Our goal also was to bring more public awareness to Bill M203, “Presumption of Illness”, and ask the public we met along our journey to help us flip our tire, and sign our petition that would hopefully persuade our Provincial Government to pass this bill into Legislation.

Bill M203 -2016 Workers Compensation Amendment Act –

This Act amends the Workers Compensation Act in order to provide support and care for British Columbia’s first responders. The Act creates a presumptive clause for first responders suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder. In recognition of the crucial role paramedics, firefighters, police officers, and others play in ensuring the health and safety of British Columbian’s, this Act guarantees that they will receive timely support and treatment when they are suffering from exposure to traumatic events.

Raising awareness to any cause is a extremely difficult task.

Especially when it involves Emergency Service Providers and their families on an international level, adding to it, the fact that in Canada alone over the past 2 years, 179 First Responders have died by suicide.

YOU are driving down the road, holding your wife’s hand, as the sound of your children’s giggles in the backseat warm your thoughts, when out of nowhere, S M A S H – you get hit by a truck who just ran a red light.

I don’t need to paint this picture, you see what I see, the smell of gasoline lingers in the air, your hardly conscious, you look to the backseat, there isn’t one, the sound of flames crackle in the background as you can barely reach for your cell phone to call 911.

“Dispatch 911, what is your emergency?”

You explain the tragically gruesome scene to the dispatch agent.

Response from the Agent –

“Sorry but we can’t respond to your emergency right now, but if you go visit our website, and take the next 3 months time to simply jump through all our bullshit hoops, then please get signed off by 3 different doctors, and check yourself into a treatment center, but before you do that, you will also need to submit your last 15 years of medical records, then if you do have any money left, we will need you to just answer 750 of our scientifically proven to make sense to somebody questionnaire”.

If you haven’t taken your own life by that point from watching your family suffer more and more each day, we will be sure to give you a few more meds to numb the pain and your suicidal thoughts, umm wait sir, before you hang up – we will need to confirm your mailing address so we can be sure to mail your very first denial with 37 more pages of hoops to jump through before you begin the appeal process.

Thank you for calling Worksafe BC, we sincerly hope all works out for you, and if you do live long enough to make your way through all the smoke and mirrors, not to worry, we do have 3 more departments on stand by that make bigger salaries than you would in 20 years of your life to be sure you DO NOT PASS GO.

Our current system, through WorkSafe BC, is NOT DESIGNED TO HELP in any way shape or form.

Dial tone…

THIS IS THE EXACT PROCESS THAT 1000’s of our Canadian Emergency Service Providers currently are dealing with on a daily basis when they finally do reach out for help after they have suffered in silence long enough after many years of responding to our emergencies.

Your sit and question yourself as you thought you called 911 to get help, but all seems like a total blurr now, cause all of what you just heard is absolute “HOGWASH BULLSHIT”, and is so absolutely unbelievable, you begin to feel you’re in some sort of time warp on another planet.

I did not look up these facts on the internet, I have personally lived through this procedure, and answer my phone 24 hours a day from many Police Officers, Paramedics, Corrections Officers, Firefighters, Nurses, and Dispatch 911 Operators across Canada, who some are now on their 3rd – 9th year suffering minute by minute as they try and prove they deserve the help the minute they ask for it, just as we get the help the minute we call 911.


It breaks my heart at least 3 times a day over this last year and a half with the amount of tears shed, the amount of families I’ve listened to that are no longer. The amount of sadness in the voices I hear. All they did was their job, and now to be treated like criminals in a court of law, trying to prove their PTSD is work related.

People ask me, “Hey Terrance, why in the hell are you flipping that tractor tire up the side of a glacier, waist deep in snow, in -10 degree weather?

The answer is as simple as this, we can raise awareness to PTSD all we want, but how about some cold hard facts about our system which has yet to educate us properly on the signs and symptoms of PTS or give immediate treatment for those who suffer with them?

After many years of peeking our the blinds, the loss of my family, friends and careers, the amount of years I’ve spent contemplating suicide, the amount of ridiculous hoops I’ve jumped through, how many times I’ve had a rifle down my throat or side of my head, the amount of tears shed, and doors closed is my face, or knives in my back.

I will climb to the top of every mountain around the world for the rest of my life until one day we can help make changes so NO OTHER Emergency Service Provider or their family will ever have to endure that sort of pain and suffering for another minute.

ITS NOT WEAK TO SPEAK … so I just did.

My deepest, most sincere apologizes that this post is not full of unicorns, rainbows, and pink balloons, but there is just no way I can sit here and candy coat a very serious topic like Post Traumatic Stress, and the facts that our current Provincial Government / Workers Compensation Act is not helping our Emergency Service Providers that suffer from a Post Traumatic Stress Injury the minute they ask for it.


Please, take a minute to sign our petition, and share it with a friend, co worker, instagram it, tweet it, whatever it takes – NO MOUNTAIN TOO HIGH.


About the author: Terrance Kosikar

I was the first responder to a fatal accident at the Whistler Sliding Center on Opening Day of the Vancouver 2010 Winter Olympics. Although I was well trained in a myriad of life saving techniques, I was not prepared to deal with the emotional impact sustained while on the job. As a result of the fatality, I developed a Post-Traumatic Stress Injury that launched me into a very costly downward spiral. During several years of severe depression, anxiety, nightmares, and substance abuse, I lost my family, my career, and nearly my life. Pushed to my breaking point, I found salvation within. Escaping to the back-country near Lillooet, BC, I found peace and purpose in Mother Nature’s beauty and simplicity. Many others who have suffered from Post-Traumatic Stress have not been so lucky. By raising awareness and destigmatizing this debilitating mental injury, we can help the people suffering from Post-Traumatic Stress get the help they need.